Apr 23 2007
I Hate Umbrellas
I find umbrellas highly annoying. They don’t seem to do much.
OK, they are fine in perfectly vertical rainfall.
Add a little wind and … pointless.
If you have wind, you’re gonna get wet. Plus, umbrellas are AWKWARD.
You get wetter as you get in and out of cars and then you have this extra thing that is dripping all over the place once you’re indoors, in the car, wherever.
I have one of those gustbuster type umbrellas. Those are the umbrellas with a vent that prevents the umbrella from turning inside out. Mine is red.
I haven’t really put it to the test. I believe that while it may bust some gusts and not invert, why bother?
Gee, my umbrella is holding its shape but the wind is so strong the rain is horizontal.
I’d much rather wear a Gore-Tex shell and waterproof boots.
If I have the gear, it’s all “Singing In the Rain” (sans umbrella) and stepping into puddles. There’s nothing like wearing waterproof boots and stepping into puddles.
Why do I hate umbrellas?
Let me recount the whys…
- You lose the use of one arm.
- You bump into other umbrella users.
- You could poke out someone’s eye.
- It’s another thing to lug around.
- They drip all over the place.
- You always end up losing them.
What about you? Do you find umbrellas annoying?
I just had this discussion yesterday. = )
Shama: you mean you don’t like umbrellas either? It’s been “April Showers” where I live and so far I’ve managed to avoid using an umbrella. Part of me wants to test out the gust-busting capabilities of my red umbrella, the other part says, What’s the point?
Idahoans aren’t allowed to hate umbrellas. Neither are Washingtonians. It’s in the state constitutions.
I definitely agree with you on this one. Here in San Luis Obispo it’s always raining, but windy. I remember the first time it rained my first year here and the wind made my umbrella turn inside out!
Whenever I use my umbrella, pretty much everything get’s soaked except for my chest and head because of the wind. I try tilting my umbrella, but that usually doesn’t help much. grrr
Gregg: So – you ready to give up the umbrella and get some gear?
Have you ever tried sharing an umbrella with someone else-like your partner? I’ve got this little wiener of a thing (kind of like an oversized hand-fan), not really fit to keep a wombat dry. When we go out in the rain I have to be a gentleman (I’m the taller of the two of us, and it’s chivalrous isn’t it?), so she only gets a little wet, while I get soaked.
In Japan, women often use umbrellas to block the Sunlight-they’re worried that it’ll darken their skin and make them look poor. Geez, imagine what they’d do if they saw the Australian Sun-we’ve got the biggest hole in the ozone over us-a huge amount of skin cancer cases get reported every year. Funny that in Western countries we ‘try’ to look darker-’Wow, nice tan, where have you been you lucky dog?’
Umbrellas…someone made a pretty penny off of them. Those giant ones are cool for sitting under-unless there’s a strong wind. Then a whole group can lose their heads as well as their eyes!
Jesse: I’ve shared an umbrella and generally its because a chivalrous man is holding one over me. At four-foot-ten-and-three-quarter-inches, everyone is taller than I. I can’t hold an umbrella over anyone much taller than…a wombat.
I’ve seen Asian woman carry umbrellas to block the sun here in the states as well. They have beautiful skin! I use SPF 45 on my face and still get freckles. I’ve used sunscreen for years and it must be a Chinese thing as I tan easily but I’m also on the paler side of the Chinese so can burn if I don’t watch it.
I asked my dermatologist why I still get freckles despite the sunscreen (freckles on the nose run in my family) and she said, “You have to wear a hat.”
What’s the point then?
But you bring up a good point about umbrellas – they are fine if there’s no rain! Not that it makes me like ‘em.
honestly . . i like carrying around a umbrella . . . i can push elevator buttons with them and smack loud annoying children with them . . . i’m kidding .. about one of those
Gary: since you live in S. California and WORK FROM HOME I can’t imagine you’ll be needing an umbrella that often.