Aug 15 2008
CH-Ch-ch-Changes
Last weekend I went to my 25th high school reunion.
Now…I’m not really a reunion person. Well, I should clarify that I’m not a High School Reunion person. High school wasn’t the best time of my life.
Yeah it was during my “formative years” but what formed out of high school was a young woman with a nice GPA, little esteem and no clue about what she was going to do next.
This state lasted for a while. Except for maybe the GPA when I quit going to college. Now that I think about it again, GPAs stick with you for life. At least that’s how most people seem to look at them.
People will crow, “I was a straight A student all through college” or “Yeah, you’d never think a C student would become CEO…”
In case you’re wondering at what all I looked like 25 years ago, here’s me back when I was Miss Q:
I also went to my 5th high school reunion. Having a 5th seemed a bit bizarre but I went and it was mainly because I had felt I had changed (new! improved!) a bit since people had last seen me.
I skipped all the other reunions because the few people I’d really want to see again were not reunion types. Plus, I was out of town or had any number of excuses.
News of the 25th reunion comes up and this time around I though, well… a little revisiting of the past might not be a bad thing.
I show up in the little black dress I wore at a cousin’s wedding. I wasn’t sure what to wear and asked one of the reunion planners. I didn’t look out of place at all.
I get a nametag that includes my yearbook photo. Good idea. I see semi-familiar faces and most people seem relaxed and more than willing to laugh at not remembering anyone.
- One woman looked like she hadn’t aged. It was freaky. She was Indian with great bone structure.
- Most people looked like older versions of themselves.
- Some people gained weight.
- Some lost weight.
- One woman lost a LOT of weight.
One woman came up to me and said, “Do you remember me?”
When I said that no…she was vaguely familiar but no…I didn’t really recall her…
She then pointed to one of the group shots from the past and when I peered at it asked again, “Now do you remember me? I hung out with X and Y?”
She didn’t say X and Y but the photo I saw had a group of 3 women striking a feathered hair pose. Still no big AHA for me.
I said hi to one guy with a shaved head. He was very white with light coloring so I wasn’t sure if he had actually shaved his head or had gone through chemo. I recalled liking him. I told him so.
He said, “You liked me? Why?”
I said, “I dunno. I don’t even recall what classes we had together. I just have a good feeling about you and recall thinking you were a nice guy.”
He said, “Really? Huh. I was just thinking that if I had met myself – who I was back then – I would be thinking that I was a little sh*t.”
I said, “I don’t remember that. I just know that I felt warmly towards you.”
He said, “Good to know that I wasn’t all bad back then.”
He also told me that he had gone to the 20th and this reunion was nicer because it was more like a reunion where people caught up. The 20 was a big party with an open bar and everyone getting..happy.
I shared a table with some people I had hung out with. That was nice. They were nice folks then, are still nice folks. I didn’t know the guy who sat next to me so I asked, “Who are you now?” I thought it was a better question than, “What are you doing now?” and he seemed like someone I could ask.
He said, “I’m not so in my head anymore. I used to be so…in my head. I’ve been working on being more out of my head.”
I knew what he meant.
I danced. People had been drinking so the party mood increased as the night wore on.
As I was dancing, the woman who had hung out with X and Y spun around on the dance floor and when she spotted me, broke into a boozy smile and headed towards me. We all continued to dance and she thrust her head towards me to the beat of the music and asked, “SO DO YOU REMEMBER ME NOW??”
I had to tell her that I couldn’t.
The guy I was dancing with shrugged. He couldn’t recall her either.
What I liked was that the few people I really spoke with seemed genuinely happy and it was less about what they did but about who they were.
Except for the woman who kept asking, “Do you remember me NOW?”
The professional photographers at the reunion took the above photo.
I found it … freaky that the pose and hairstyle looked very similar to my yearbook photo. Those of you who’ve kept up with my blog know that I have had a different hairstyle since high school!
In case you are wondering, yes, I’ve always been quite…pale.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
I was looking at how radiant your smile is in the ‘now’ picture, hehehe.
You have the same smile too!
My high school (one of them) recently had a reunion. It was the only one I would want to go to but… There is one person from that class that I never want to see again. Since I have no way of knowing if that person would be there I end up not going…
Sue: Thanks! I definitely feel more radiant!
What I struggle with (and I think most people do) is embracing who I am RIGHT NOW. I look back at old photos I think, dang, not too shabby! but at the time, I would see the flaws.
I really want to just totally be OK with who I am right now. I’m mostly ok but not totally! But..getting better at this self-love thing!
HMTKSteve: glad you noticed! Yes, my smile has not changed except as Sue said, for being more radiant. I do smile bigger and brighter than I used to and I do more laughing out loud.
Whoa and having to miss your reunion due to not wanting to see someone again. It’s one thing when you can deal (and you seem like you could deal) but I’m guessing it’s the other person who may have..issues.
At my 25th one of the girls looked at me and asked if I was still a preacher. I told her I she likely had me confused with Dan X. (I couldn’t have been confused for a better man.)
One guy, a person who spent a lot of high school smoking dope, spent the reunion out front … smoking dope.
We’ve had a 5, 10, 15, 20, and 25. The 30th would have been this month, based on the past reunions … but it never came about.
MsQ!!
Super pict.’s … you can tell a lot from a smile.
Pale?? Hard tell from a black and white photo – ha haa!!
Sounds to be all in all a good time with a few interesting turns. Everytime this world makes another revolution, we find ourselves evolving. Hopefully for the better
delmer: a preacher? Oddly enough, I can at least picture it.
Hahahah on the guy who never outgrew smoking dope!
No 30th reunion? Maybe the planners ran out of steam? My school will put a few reunions together for a bigger crowd. At least, that’s what I think they’re trying to do. So they tried to get the class of 1982 into ours.
Speedy!! Glad you like the photos. I made the more current one black and white to make it easier to tell how similar the 2 photos were!
Yeah, we can hope we evolve, change for the better.
You are a brave woman. I have never gone to any of my reunions – for the 5 and 10 I was in a foreign countries so that was a good excuse and I never got an invite for the 25th – so either we didn’t have one or I wasn’t invited. You do look almost the same – beautiful! I actually look better than in high school – I was not a pretty girl back then and no money for make-up makes for an ugly combination. I am glad you had a good time and were able to tell people things that you probably could never have before…
Hey Ms. Q! I have only had time to look at the pictures so far – out of town for a funeral and plus school already started for me. But neat pictures and I’ll be back later to read the post. Just wanted to stop & say HI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sounds like way more fun than my reunion – though I didn’t go to the drinking part of mine. Maybe it would have been more fun then. I have such a hard time remembering a few of the people from my class. I can remember most of them, but sometimes it’s so hard to match up the high schooler with the person they are now and others I just flat out can’t remember at all. That is odd how similar your two pictures are!!!!! Seems like you had a good time – hope so!
Skipper: Thanks for the compliment! Your avatar shows a very attractive woman and I think that’s you, right? I know some people use avatars of models or something. It’s great that you became more attractive with age. Some people grow into their looks. I was cute (if date-free) in high school but feel more attractive now. There is something to be said for being more comfortable with yourself!
I am not sure if I was brave to go my high school reunion! My classmates were/are regular folk. I never had any run-ins with kids back in high school and I’d hope that people would outgrow those types of things but heck, some folks never grow up or out of things!
You are right about my being able to tell people things I never could have before. I’d like to think that I keep changing for the better. It does take some conscious effort though!
Jill (part 1): Thanks for stopping by and I’m sorry you had to go to a funeral.
Jill (part 2): Drinking doesn’t always make for more fun but it certainly seemed to light up a few of my former classmates! I watched what I drank what with having to drive home. I was surprised that the DJ played “The Macarena” – the last time I danced to that was at a wedding and it certainly isn’t a song from the 1980s!!
Yeah that’s sort of a strange choice. It was a lot of fun though – especially when you watch four year olds dance to it…
I cannot get enough of your smile. I’m surprised you put so much of yourself in the photo. I would have thought you would have used your (mask) that you normally put over your pics. Happy you broke out of that shell, sorta.
I’m not for pretending to no someone. If I don’t know you I won’t act like I do. And please don’t keep asking me. It won’t help me none, only make me want to leave. LOL
I’m looking back at my comment a realized that I have some errors in my statement. Oh well, was kinda tired when I wrote it.
Hope you are well.
UT: I’m glad you are enjoying my smile! No problem on errors – I knew what you meant and that’s what language is about – communication. I also find it kinda cute that you write the way I write – kinda and sorta!!
I am guessing you don’t usually write or even speak that way.
I have shifted my writing style to be very similar to the way I casually speak. One friend said, to me, “You sound just like your blog!” well..I’d hope so!
It’s more fun to write like I’m speaking to someone – I think that’s why I enjoy writing freakin’ long emails and people enjoy reading them! It’s a conversation.
I’m well and thanks for asking! I hope you’re well – I know you’ve been working hard!
Yes, I did allow more of myself to show in the photos and it was because they were so freakishly alike! I have shown my unaltered smile but of course all you saw was an extreme closeup.